Journal 9: Absent
Journal 10: The first comment that I found helpful was made by Sarah. She talked about Molly’s piece, and said that it could use some oomph, as it is about an exciting topic. This comment really hit for me, as if something doesn’t have any substance to it, it won’t interest any readers. The way Sarah said it was perfect and helped me think about ways that I might spice up my article and make it more engaging.
A second comment that stood out to me was made by Finn, and it was when he told Molly that all of the pieces are there for her piece, they just needed to be rearranged. I feel that way about my own article, and I have been having trouble finding a direction to take it in, so this comment made me feel better. I feel less alone in my situation, and I have more hope in my article, and my ability to rearrange it.
Journal 11: Today’s class included a very lively discussion, and both comments that I chose were posed to me. I found these comments more useful than other comments, as they were particularly tailored to my article.
The first piece of advice given to me that I found to be helpful was given by Finn, and he advised me to add more information about UNE into my article. I think that following this advice will help me to find my focus, and to cut out unnecessary information. The class suggested that a way I might do that is to add another UNE centered interview, possibly with an alumnus.
A second piece of advice that I found particularly useful today was to add some information about the Portland campus, and possibly add an interview from a student there. This addition would give more of an insight into the daily life of a college student on a more urban campus, rather than our quiet campus in Biddeford. The article would be more inclusive and well-rounded with the addition, and I think it will give me a lot more credibility.
Journal 12: Absent
Journal 13: The first comment that I found helpful during Friday’s editing session came from Jesse, and it was when he said that if you’re only talking to two people, you probably aren’t talking to enough people. This helped me realize that in order to make sure my piece is well rounded, I need to talk to people introduced to me by the people I initially interviewed. For future pieces, I will make sure to do a bit more networking to help me find interviewees. The second comment I found helpful was from Nick, and it was when he told Gage that he should find people in control of the decisions he is writing about to talk to. Finding the people who actually made changes or decisions that you are writing about is a good idea as it gives the reader insight as to why these changes may have happened, allowing the reader a more well-rounded view of the situation. I found this comment helpful as I will use this angle when deciding who to talk to for future stories.
